When I was a little kid, we went only to one place for my parents’ vacations – Vincennes, Indiana. The negative aspect of this fact is that we never went anywhere special for vacation. I guess that’s why I think it’s so important to give my kids great vacations. As a kid myself, I can recall only once, when we went to Mammoth Caves. The pro though of going only to Vincennes is that because we usually stayed at my dad’s parents place, I got to spend a lot of time with Grandma and Granddad. If given the opportunity, I’d love to interview them both today, to learn and write their story…..so many questions I’d love to ask.
In a number of previous stories like Willows do not Always Weep (link) and The Cats (link), I did a little dad-bashing. My dad does deserve some credit, however. I am not a cigarette smoker and I owe it all to dear old dad. True, I did imbibe a bit on that feistier leaf for a spell (link) but I never acquired a taste for, nor have a desire to try tobacco.
I am (too) quickly approaching the 60th year of life on this fragile planet. Like you I suspect, I have seen in my time a number of relatives suffer from and/or die from cancer. All of them were smokers. Both my dad and my step father were smokers for multiple decades and both of them died of cancer in their late fifties to early sixties. My Aunt, Dad’s sister, same thing; she was a three packer. Continue reading
Do you have a major, overriding life goal, one that guides your actions above all others? I hope so as it can really help to drive your focus and attention to your long term planning activities as well as your contingency actions. Mine was relatively straightforward; be a better dad than my own. To me, this translates into working hard to provide them with options in life, options I never had, and trying to leverage my own life lessons in order to help my boys succeed, (or at least avoid some failures).
When my youngest boy graduated from a private liberal arts high school, I had felt that I had accomplished my life goal. They each had attended college on my dime and now my youngest had the benefit of a Waldorf education and could go to college on my dime if he chose to. Sometimes though, I have my doubts – did I really do the best that I could, did I give them each the best advice I could? Continue reading
When I write these little true life adventures, I try my best to relate them to any event or thought that’s going on in the present. Sometimes it doesn’t always work, but most of the time it does. When I first began writing these, I did it on a whim, not thinking that I would still be writing them more than a year later. I thought, how many stories can I write, fifty maybe? At some point, I began to get excited over the prospect of leaving behind a compendium of my life, something my kids and grandkids could possibly enjoy reading after I’m long gone. Continue reading
Well, here we are – another Easter. A time for reflection and celebration. Different images are conjured up for me when I think of Easters past. As a kid I am reminded of a scratchy suit and tie, sitting through grueling long sermons in church and trying very hard to stay awake. As an ex-Hamiltuckian, unfortunately I am reminded of a brutal Easter massacre. This marks the 40th Easter anniversary for the James Ruppert murders of 11 family members. As a kid, the event spawned a favorite saying – “going Ruppert” on someone preceded “going postal”. If you’re interested in that type of thing, I found this interesting video on YouTube.
Mostly though, Easter conjures up memories of Easter egg hunts with my kids. Continue reading
As mentioned briefly in Camaro and Firebirds (read me) we all remember quite vividly the places we’ve lived and the many memories that are forged in those places. Indeed, our paths in this life, the things we do, the things that happen to us, they are all strongly linked to the choices we’ve made for the places we’ve chosen to live in. The tiniest change could have impacted so many elements of our past and future. In our case, had we not moved to Louisiana, we might not have a third child, who knows? I do – everything would change, everything. Everything we see, everything we do, every choice we make is linked to every future action and choice. It is a spiderweb, so choose wisely. Continue reading
And now, the exciting conclusion to Everybody Loves Tim Part One.
And here we are, some 20 years later.
For awhile, during high school and a few months after, I was doing the ‘normal Dad thing’ with Tim. You know, coaching him to go to college, offering him up with various alternatives for the future, etc. I kept running into a brick wall until I finally realized – “Tim” needs to push himself. Tim needs to be the one to figure out what it is he wants to be, what he wants to do to earn money enough to finance whatever lifestyle he wants to live.
Let’s do a big flashback and go back to the beginning. Continue reading
No one knows your weaknesses, your strengths, your vulnerabilities like your spouse does. With that said, anyone who’s been married for a number of years knows then what a fair fight and an unfair fight is. An unfair fight is one of harsh words, words that cut beneath the skin. Words are more harmful than a smack in the face. A smack leaves a mark but it always goes away within a few days. Harmful words pierce the heart – they can take years to heal, if ever. Continue reading