Scattered within all of these little stories I’m sharing with you, there is a ‘sub story’ about the progression and development of my love affair with my wife. The stories are in chronological order, intermittently published. I’ll begin this one here by telling you that this is the story about telling my girlfriend Kim, (now my wife), for the very first time that I loved her. I don’t know where the story will go. Even though this occurred almost 40 years ago, the memory is easy enough to share. It’s the background, the ‘noise’ if you will, that I think will take the longest for me to think through and document. Was I scared to say I love you? If so, why? How far back does it go? Am I needy, why did I always have a girlfriend, what was the reason? Why did I feel so certain that Kim was the one?
In our high school years, is there anything more stressful, more demanding or more public than our love lives? If you ‘go with someone’, everyone knows about it. Breakup; it’s buzzed from ear to ear in a rate equaling the speed of a Japanese bullet train. Today it’s even more public and faster; relationships begin at school, (or maybe Tinder if you’re older), they’re announced in Facebook, (sometimes with a “marriage”), and break ups are coordinated in Facebook so as to help the breakup end cordially, without additional drama. In my day, it was no less stressful, but the act of breaking up was not as immediate as it is today. Oh no – you got to see it coming, carefully stalking you like a cheetah on a gazelle and then when you knew that it was all over, BAM, your heart was suddenly being chewed on. Continue reading
The last story in the ‘Chasing Kim’ saga dealt with the first night I shared meeting the parents, watching home movies and necking in the basement. It was a thrilling two parter so if you need to revisit them before you begin this exciting chapter, then please do. Here are the links (Part 1) (Part 2). (Read me)
This is the exciting conclusion to last week’s introductory story. (read me)
Dinner; all the family was there; Mom (Gerri), Dad (Mel), brothers Scott and Kevin and sister Traci. I’m not quite sure how Kim prepped her siblings, but they were all kinda’ treating me sort of like Bright Eyes from the Planet of the Apes. I felt a bit like I was in a cage and was supposed to do something, perhaps entertain. It was fun being the center of attention, I guess. Continue reading
Are you married? Maybe you’re currently dating. Do they still call it dating? Back when I was a kid, we called it “liking” someone. If you liked someone well enough, you asked them to “go steady”. If you went steady, you each traded something important and gave it to the other person to wear and to publicize that you each were spoken for. In the 50’s it was a school jacket or a pin. In my day, it was an ID bracelet in Jr High, (read me), then class rings in high school. In fact, going steady was often the whole reason for getting a class ring for a lot of us. Today, the kids pronounce they are “married” as a Facebook status.
The failure on my part in late ’73, early 1974 with Betty set me back a bit. In that story (read me), I had mentioned that I had a girlfriend pretty much in every year previously. Losing Betty caused a little moping and ‘regrouping’ I guess. I went in and out of several 1-2 week relationships with girls I honestly can’t remember the names of today. I think one’s name was Sherri Hicks, but I still can’t remember the name of that girl I had to fight over (read me). There was also the fact in 1974 for a time, the only thing I had on my mind was getting pot and smoking it with a couple of ‘pot friends’. This will be a story in of itself one day.
It was 10th grade, early 1974 and the Vietnam War was finally ending – a time for new beginnings.
In one of my stories I will list all the crazy connections I’ve noted between my wife and me. The story today is about the first time I ever saw Kim, now my wife. Continue reading
My wife and I were “destined” to be with each other. I absolutely know this to be truth. How do I know? Well, you will have to stay tuned into my blog to learn as I am slowly making my way into those stories. Before I posted any Kim tales, I wanted to write all the other childhood girlfriend stories to document my learning experience on the path to finding the love of my life, my wife of 35 year; indeed another childhood sweetheart as well since Kim and I began our journey together during high school. The story here is of my final love before finally given the opportunity to try to win my future wife’s heart.
At least for a partial time during the school year, I pretty much had a girlfriend in every grade while growing up. Unless we were playing together, I never really knew much of what to do with them though except maybe to carry their books and walk them home. My first real ‘dating’ experience came at the age of 15. Her name was Betty. I met her at the First Baptist Church at one of the junior roller socials we used to have in the gymnasium. A ‘roller social’ was a time where we cleared the gymnasium floor, (which was also the church on Sunday), and we roller skated. It was open to us teenagers and it was a nice way to give us a safe haven to hang out at. Betty had come with a friend and I was immediately attracted to her big brown eyes and pretty face.
I gave it some serious thought and came to the conclusion that it’s connected to a vivid childhood memory of love lost. My summer girlfriend of 1971 when I was 13 was Diane Mathews. In hindsight, Diane was my first ‘long-term relationship’. Diane was a year older than I and attended St. Peters Catholic school, whereas I attended public schools. She was cool and she was a good athlete. She became the mold for my perfect woman, the one who I eventually fell in love with and married. Continue reading