Empty Packages at Christmas…..or Were They?

What do I want for Christmas? How ’bout your hand out of my crotch?

 

Well, at the time of this writing, it is nearing the ultimate season of joy, that time of year of great giving.  No, I’m not speaking of tax season.  I’m of course talking about Christmas. Continue reading

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All I Want for Christmas is a Little Magic (and a One Man Army Killing Machine)

What do I want for Christmas? How 'bout your hand out of my crotch?

What do I want for Christmas? How ’bout your hand out of my crotch?

 

I’ve written a couple of Christmas related stories I think.  Let me go look.  Yes, here is one where my Dad felt the urge to be benevolent so he shared the truth about there not being a Santa as he was walking out the door (link), (probably headed out to the local tavern).  Oh, and just to prove that the teasing gene does indeed get passed down through the generations, you’ll read about a couple of nice tricks I played on our youngest boy in this same story.

AD – After Dinosaurs, there were Jackalopes & Christmas Surprise

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My dad just loved to tease.  When we were little, he liked to play a question and answer game with us 3 boys.  An example:

Dad – Robbie, what is 12 times 12?  Me – 144.  Dad – right!

Dad – Steve, (Steve was only 5), what was Einstein’s theory of relativity…was it E=mc2?  Steve – yes.  Dad – very good, Steve!

Dad – ok Mike, your turn, (Mike was 4),…what famous President was the Washington Monument named after?  (pause)…..  Mike – you’re giving Steve all the easy ones!  Mike getting angry and upset…so Dad – ok, ok…here’s an easy one Mike.  What color is Washington’s white horse?  Mike – you said you would give me an easy one!!  At which point Mike’s face would get red with anger and he would storm out of the room and be upset for perhaps 10 minutes. Continue reading